We are in the month that marks the one year anniversary of “when our lives have been forever changed."
Have you noticed in this past year that you have gone from feelings of kindness, and empathy to perhaps being “chippy," cynical, having attitude, depressed more than less, isolated confused, feeling deep sadness and anxiety?
Those of you who have experienced the death of a loved one and are mourning that loss may recognize some of those grief responses that are found in your;
· Behaviours (restless, increase in addictive behaviour, antisocial such as violence)
· Physical Symptoms (Eating and sleep pattern disrupted, headaches and body aches, fatigue and muscle weakness, short of breath and blood pressure change)
· Emotional feelings (fear , anger, anxiety ,depression, apathy , loneliness, feeling of loss of control)
· Cognitive thinking (confusion, decrease in focus and making decisions, apathy, disorganized)
· Spiritual (question meaning and purpose of life, loss of trust, feeling hopeless, and powerless)
Remember that Change - creates a Loss - creates a Grief Response
Could we be experiencing a “Covid” Grief?
Recognize, acknowledge and embrace your new grief. Give it a name; anger, fear, deep sadness, isolation, depression, loneliness, anxiety, fear, confusion and helplessness. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You may not have recognized you were grieving, yet a new loss. Now that you have identified a new and great loss of normalcy (life as it used to be), what can you do?
In the light of the “normal” returning we have to look at what the “new normal” might look like and what we can do to navigate this journey.
We can look at connection that we are all missing. How can we connect from a distance?
Some ideas have come from a blog from Crisis and Trauma Resource Institute Blog@ctrinstitute.com . It seems like isolation and loneliness is not leaving so we need to find ways to connect. Use the electronics if you are comfortable with them. Using a text message, an email, zoom or face book and face time. If electronics is not your or the other person’s comfort zone, how about a phone call? Nothing is quite as good as hearing a voice. How about finding someone you haven’t called in a while and surprise them with a phone call? Catch up on what is happening. Another great way to make someone’s day is to send a card and a positive note as hand writing is special to receive . Value those in your life and let them know , this will generate a dialog and you will also receive responses. Start a Gratitude jar and put a gratitude in every morning and evening.
Don’t forget Self Care. How about taking a walk and breathe in that air and listen for the sounds around you? Look at the birds, snow, sun and feel a part of the freedom. Limit your amount of computer time. Don’t schedule multiple zoom meetings and get up and move around often when you have to be on zoom meetings and computer work.
We wonder what the future will look like and try to think what the Big Picture will look like. What will our “New Normal” be like? Try to look at one day at a time or even half a day. Learn all you can on how to navigate this new grief journey and remember Knowledge Is Power.
If you feel Covid has locked you down, isolated you, taken your normalcy away there are some things Covid can’t cancel.
An article sent to me author unknown says the following:
NOT EVERYTHING IS CANCELLED
· Sunshine isn’t cancelled,
· Spring isn’t cancelled,
· Love isn’t cancelled,
· Relationships aren’t cancelled,
· Reading isn’t cancelled ,
· Naps aren’t cancelled,
· Devotion isn’t cancelled, Music isn’t cancelled,
· Dancing isn’t cancelled,
· Kindness isn’t cancelled,
· Imagination isn’t cancelled ,
· Conversation isn’t cancelled,
· HOPE isn’t cancelled,
· FRIENDS aren’t cancelled.
Keep looking up!
Fear does not stop death it stops life and worrying does not take away tomorrows troubles, it takes away today’s peace.
Just think about it... how privileged we are that during a global pandemic, we can stay home comfortably reading, working , watching T.V. and with a fridge stocked with food - Do remind yourself to be grateful today Might not be tonight , tomorrow or the next day... but everything is going to be O.K.
To make a difference in someone’s life you don’t have to be brilliant, rich beautiful or perfect.
YOU JUST HAVE TO CARE.
Submitted by Walking Through Grief Society – Shirley Scott
Supported by FCSS: City of Lloydminster, Towns of Vermilion and Wainwright, Villages of Kitscoty and Marwayne and County of Vermilion River and donations.
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